Whether we succeed in a big way, fail in a big way or something in between, it will be the sum total of the choices we make.
There is a general tendency to look at highly successful people and assume they have had an easy time of it. Outwardly, it appears their path to success was a straight line, from the bottom to the top without interruption. For those who have fallen from grace or squandered and lost fortunes, their path appears to lead straight down, suddenly, from dizzying heights to a rocky bottom.
Both of these scenarios have something in common. The pathway to success is never straight and neither is the road to ruin.
Every day we are each presented with a multitude of choices. Do I go left or right, say yes or no, buy or don’t but, stay or leave, agree or disagree, eat this or avoid that, exercise or not?
Some of these choices seem small and insignificant while others seem to carry a good deal of weight. Most of us trivialize the small stuff and worry, fret and sweat over the big stuff. I say most because some seem to agonize more over the smallest decisions while ignoring life’s big picture items.
Whether we feel a choice is small or large is a matter of perception more than reality, because our picture of the world is always incomplete. And while we may feel in control of ourselves and what will happen when we choose, we can never know the final outcome of our choice in advance and we can never control the actions of others.
Even the smallest decisions can have huge consequences of which we are unaware. Or, our biggest decisions can turn out to have little consequence in the grand scheme of things. One thing is certain, all of our decisions have consequences.
At your lowest point, the easiest option may be to give up, but it is rarely the best option.
I’ve been there, multiple times. We all have. You feel overwhelmed, burned out, defeated. You feel like you have given it your all and things just aren’t working out. You feel you’ve made a mess of things, desperate, like everything is out of your control and there seems to be no way out but one — give up.
I believe I know why the feeling of wanting to give up emerges. At our lowest point it wells up from deep down inside, a desire for whatever it is to just end, for it to be over. So, you won’t have to think about it or deal with it any further.
It is a very uncomfortable, low energy place to be. No one would want to stay there willingly. Although, the easiest option may be to give up, it is rarely the best option.
I believe when we feel forced to consider quitting, life is trying to teach us some things we need to know. As long as we are in control of our own thoughts and behavior, there will always be other and better options.
Here are 9 things you should know or do when you feel most like giving up.
Resilience describes the ability of people to bounce back from adversity. Anyone who is not resilient can become resilient. It is a learned behavior.
Resilience is such a great word. The word holds so much sparkling promise to me. We use the word resilience in psychology to describe the ability of people to bounce back from adversity. It is a trait common to people who, when knocked down by life, simply spring back with renewed and dedicated intent to overcome hardship and come back even stronger than before. It may be the ultimate key to happiness and well being.
Resilience is marked by such characteristics as optimism, positive attitudes, the ability to regulate and attenuate emotions, and an enduring capability to see failure as an opportunity to learn and grow. Following misfortune, the resilient among us are able change course, marshal their inner strength and soldier on.
Resilience is often missing from people who are either burned out or burning out in their work, relationships or on living. Resilience is a key factor in fostering engagement through purposeful work. Engagement, with the three hallmarks of vigor (energy), dedication (involvement) and absorption (efficacy), is the exact opposite of burnout.
Resilience isn’t something only a few people can have. It is a compilation of thoughts, behaviors and actions. Anyone who is not resilient can become resilient. It is a learned behavior. But like any acquired skill, it must be practiced.